"Once,
I was sitting in the hairdresser's wearing a black robe, with a
towel wrapped round my head, watching another client across the
room. She looked very fierce - I thought she might be Greek - and
I thought, 'Ooh-er, I wouldn't like to pass her on a dark
night.' Then I moved, and the woman moved - and she turned out to
be my reflection in a mirror. I was positively shocked at how
stern my face is in repose.
When you're
talking about faces, I don't know that you can separate the
outside features from what's going on inside. Most people say
you can tell character through the eyes, but I think - possibly
because I'm deaf, and lip-read a lot - that mouths are very
telling. Mine seems to be staying reasonably generous-looking
thank God. I'm fortunate to be in a profession where you do
learn how to hide your faults. A make-up person once said about
me, 'She cleans up well,' and I do. I know how to use make-up,
even if I sometimes use too much.
My hair, I've
never been able to deal with. It's a perfectly good head of
scraggy old hair, and I can get it to look okay on a
just-getting-out-of-the-swimming-pool level. But for it to look
grown-up or decent, I have to have someone to do it for me. I
change the colour all the time. I think it suits me better
darker, but I feel jollier when it's blonde. It's many years
since I've seen the original colour, which I seem to remember as
a respectable shade of mouse. When I don't have to, I don't care
much about grooming - I tend to look at my reflection in the
mirror as seldom as possible. On the other hand, I would not
consider leaving the house without both my fingernails and my
toenails really well done. So I always have a manicure, even
when I'm gardening. As for my toenails, I think they look a
great deal prettier painted.
My cleansing
routine is quite simple - I don't think Pond's Cold Cream has
been beaten yet. I am a little over-conscious of cleanliness,
which comes from being an actress. It was Marlon Brando - he's
devoted to Gold Spot, incidentally - who said to me that you
shouldn't ask other people to fancy your smells. And I usually
use perfume - right now, I'm heavily into Samsara by Guerlain.
So when I've got my nails done, and a dab of scent behind each
ear, I'm fine for the world!
Nature has made
me a little plumper than I would like, but I've taught my brain
to compensate for it by sensible eating and exercise. I don't go
over 8½ stone: 8 stone 2 is gorgeous. When you get a bit
older, you do have to compromise between your face and your
body, because if you're not careful, your face can get pulled
and haggard. But then again, is cellulite on the bum really what
you want?
I have my parents
to thank that I have a strong spine - I never have back problems
- and on the whole I'm very healthy. Says she, lighting a
cigarette! I don't diet, but I have trained myself to know that
sugar is very short-term gratification, and that one bit of
chocolate equals one spot on the face. I commit the crime of
caffeine, which is a very silly drug, but I do try to limit it
to the mornings. But, oh, a cup of coffee and a cigarette after
exercise is so heavenly!
I wish I
exercised more. I try to stretch every day, although sometimes
it's only a 10-minute fast-walk to the end of the street and
back before I dash off. But I do strap leg weights around my
ankles to make it more effective.
On the whole, I'm
quite pleased with my body - it's strong and healthy which is
the most important thing. But sometimes I think of getting a
line tattooed where my bottom should end and my legs begin -
just to mark the spot on that dreadful slide down where it's
supposed to be. And speaking of legs, God didn't give me the
pair He was going to. He decided not to at the last minute. They
were going to be much longer, thank you very much; but He got so
far down, and then He forgot. A bit careless of Him, really.
I would be a fool
to complain too heavily about anything. My face has good bones -
and let's face it, anyone can look pretty with the bloom of
youth, but bones are the thing in the end - and what I haven't
got, I can just try to compensate for. I don't envy other
people, or wish I were other than I am, because it's not
productive to think in those terms.
And hell, I've
fooled a lot of people over many years into thinking that I'm
this sophisticated, glamorous woman, when the truth of the
matter is that I'm really dead scruffy!"
